Tech Tip (for absolute dummiez)

I was commenting on someone's blog and I clicked "sign out" instead of "publish." My whole body went hot because I haven't signed out of this class ever! So I quickly went to sign in, and then I noticed I have SIX google accounts! I spent a few minutes going through accounts and removing those that I never use. Then when I went to log in... I seriously couldn't figure out my password! I couldn't believe it. It ended up being a lower case "c" giving me problems. I successfully logged back in, and then I set the account to ALWAYS REMEMBER ME.

I guess this isn't so much as a tip, but more of a cautionary tale.

Tip- don't be a dummy, remember to save your log in! A text bubble should appear when you sign in, and it'll directly ask you if you would like to have the site remember your log in.

And pay attention to what you're clicking!
Fiverr5

Reading Notes; The Bodhi Tree

• Bodh Gaya
  -The town where Buddha found enlightenment 
• The Bodhi Tree
  -Buddha sat beneath the Bodhi Tree and this is where he attained enlightenment.
  -Produces fig fruits 
• Symbolic for growth towards freedom towards enlightenment.
• Known for wisdom 
• "Roots dig deep in the waters of infinity."
• A tree of refuge, safe from the harms of the outside world.
• The meditation beneath the tree
  -four phases
  -the mind opens like a water lily
  -the mind becomes like water, a drop in the unity of life. 
• Exploring past lives

Wisdom Tree

Le Jardine Imaginare

Famous Last Words, Week 9

This week I learned how necessary working ahead is! I was thrown into being a dresser backstage for the show I assistant directed, which has been very hectic but super rewarding. Did I mention time consuming? I missed the storybook assignment this week because I was in the theatre building costumes and whatnot until I was exhausted. Then Friday morning I got a mild concussion.... whoops?  I went back to check my grade today and I'm still making an A, which was both reliving and inspiring to keep pushing through and working harder to maintain that grade. I need to dedicate more time to my storybook this upcoming week, and I plan to push ahead on that assignment.

But for tonight I'm going to finish up a bunch of extra credit and then celebrate closing my show! 

Robin Huston as Diana Goodmen
(personal photo)
Final dress rehearsal:
Diana is singing about how her medication numbs her from life,
so she decides to dump her pills and go off the medication.
For whatever reason, Robin mistakenly pours the pills into her purse rather than the trash can.
Luckily we caught this iconic mistake on camera!

Reading Notes, Queen Maya

 King Suddhodana And Queen Maya

Queen Maya

-beautiful, like a goddess

-beautiful voice, like a bird

-black hair, eyes like a diamond

-virtuous 

-loving

-wanted happiness for her people

"My lord, there is great suffering in the world, and I look with compassion on all who suffer. I would be helpful to my fellow-creatures; I would close my mind to evil thoughts. And since I shall forbear doing and thinking evil, since I am thus kind to myself, I would be helpful, I would be kind to others, too. I will put aside pride, O king, and I will not listen to the voice of evil desire. I will never utter a vain or dishonorable word. My lord, henceforth I will lead a life of austerity; I will fast; and I will never bear ill will or commit wickedness, suffer anxiety or hatred, know anger or covetousness. I will be satisfied with my lot; I will forswear deceit and envy; I will be pure; I will walk in the straight path; and I will practise virtue. And because of these things my eyes are now smiling, because of these things my lips are now joyous."

"It is well, my lord," said she. "But hear me further. Free your prisoners. Give generously to the poor. Let men and women and children be happy! Be merciful, O king, and, that the world may be joyous, be a father to all living creatures!"

The Life of Buddha, Part One

Learning by H.E.A.R.T

Post Secret 

Post Secret Fan Pop

When I was looking at the Learning by H.E.A.R.T options, I came across the Post Secret book. I actually was given a big book of them, so I went searching for it in my house. I spent like, two hours going through the whole thing. It was really hard, because I would find myself relating to really tough secrets. Or I would just carry a heart full of empathy for the person. The book is pretty old, and I know it's awful, but I found myself wondering how many of these people ended up killing themselves. I hope all of those people have found their own sense of peace. 

Famous Last Words

This week is going to be such lower stakes, because I finally finished and I'm about to turn in my capstone paper! It's weird, because I thought that I would feel really accomplished, but the whole thing has been quite anti-climatic. I wrote over a play that I was just in, because that's what my advisor wanted me to do. I didn't really want to, because I didn't love the role or even like the show. But, I did it. I think that's why I don't feel fulfilled by the experience, because I wanted so much more from it. But it's done, and that's what is important!

Growth Mindset

Happiness Jar

I'm really excited to try this out! I think that it'll be really beneficial in a year. It's so easy to forget about the good things. If I do it once a day, I'll have 365 GOOD things to recall. Incredible! 

Growth Mindset Midway

W. Churchhill
google images

I definitely wanted to be doing far better in this course; I feel like it sets you up for ultimate success!
I was really overwhelmed at the beginning of the semester because I was in rehearsals for a challenging show that was really giving me trouble. I'm also in our actor's professional prep class, which is so time consuming. And I'm taking a playwriting course which demands a 10 minute play every week. I resolved with myself that I would do my best here, and then once I was free(er) I would jump in with extra credit and really hit the ground running.

Then I was offered an assistant directing position for a show I'm crazy passionate about, and I was offered a principal role in a film.

I want to think that I can do it all. But I over committed myself, and since everything else is performance based I absolutely had to pour everything I had into those areas.

I'm really proud of all the work I'm doing right now, but I shouldn't have allowed myself to fall behind here. It's kind of embarrassing; I would miss important notes because I wasn't paying enough attention.

On the other hand, I'm proud of the work I have done in here. I've written on topics completely foreign, learned really great techniques for giving feedback, and have also read really great works and stories. I really enjoy this class!

So, if I've learned anything in these last 8 weeks it's definitely about time management, knowing my own limits, and learning to say no.

Besides all that----

Doing the checklist was really beneficial for me. I learned that I tend to fall into the right hand category, and that's definitely good. I've also learned that I am the queen of questions. We'll have guest speakers come into our pro prep class and it's like I never shut up. At first I was really self-conscious because I thought everyone was judging me, but my peers started to thank me because I was asking exactly what they were thinking. Guests, and I mean some pretty important people, have all commented that I ask really good questions. I stand out in that way, and I'm memorable to people in my industry who could offer me jobs someday.

I had mentioned that I over committed myself, but it was all because I began saying "yes" to projects I would normally say "no". And I've grown from that! I've learned that I love assisting and I'm growing a skill set that could help me find jobs in the entertainment industry besides acting. I have much more confidence in my abilities outside of being a performer, which is really important to me, because that's been something I've been insecure about for the last three years.

Overall, I think my main issue was that I gave myself the option to come back to this class and catch up. Maybe for some people that works, but I've learned that it doesn't for me. So if I'm giving the opportunity of "catch up later" in the future, I'm going to disregard that option and treat it as if completion is only possible in the now.

Tech Tip! Embedded videos.

Wow, who would have thought I'd have a tech tip?! Technology is something I strive to get better with, because HTML is not my strength.

Here's a tip for those working on a storybook-

I wanted to add embed a youtube video in my story. I figured easy enough, right? I copied the embed link from youtube and paste it in the text box.

Of course, that doesn't work.

So, you'll have to go to the HTML button. The next text box will pop up and there will be the text, followed by the HTML of other codes, like a break in a paragraph. Simply find the area where you'd like your video to pop up, and add the embed link there.

And there you go! Easy and simple!

Storytelling, The Round Table

MOM

BEN 

INT:  Kitchen.

The interior furniture and appliances are all white, the counter tops are cut from a fine granite. There is an island center stage, this island contains the sink which is perfectly centered. To the left of the sink is a dish drying rack. To the right is a container used to organize silverware. Downstage left corner there is a round glass table, in the middle of the table there is a large, round goldfish bowl with a single goldfish inside. The water is clean and well tended. Splitting center of the table, there are two chairs. In the upstage right corner there is a refrigerator. The three landmarks should make a strong diagonal line.

LIGHTS UP on MOM who is behind the kitchen sink, attending to a large pile of dishes in the sink. She is a pleasant looking woman, somewhere around her late 30's and very early 40's. She is beautiful yet worn, everything about her is modest yet fashionable.  The kitchen shines in the light and the air smells of pine sol. Using a soap and sponge wand she aggressively scrubs the plates and bowls and sets them to the left. There should be an alteration between plates/bowls/glassware and the spoons/knives/forks. BEN enters upstage right. He's also dressed quite moderately. Consider khaki pants and a fitted white shirt. Walking into the kitchen, he observes the room with an air of caution. He remains casual as he opens up the fridge, taking time to analyze his options. He settles for an apple. Taking a bite, he shuts the door and turns to face his step-mother. He watches as she handles the dishes with an aggravated demeanor. He sighs, and decides to take the bait.

BEN

(lightly mocking) Mother dear...

MOM doesn't answer. She heard him, but does not answer. 

BEN
The kitchen sure looks clean.
(BEAT)
The whole house looks clean.
(BEAT)
So something must be wrong. 

MOM continues to clean, shaking her head in frustration.  BEN rolls his eyes. Listen, he gave it his best shot, right? He turns and heads to exit offstage right, when MOM stops him just before he can leave. 

MOM

(looking up from her dishes, but not at BEN) I just don't understand.

BEN

Understand what? 

With the attitude of a mostly matured adult, BEN enters back into the space with a sigh.

BEN
Understand what, mother?
(takes a bite from his apple)

MOM

How many mothers have to beg their children to have sex?

Exasperated, BEN throws his arms into the air.

BEN
This again? How many times-

MOM
As many times as it takes!
(BEN begins to protest but MOM hammers on)
Don't you want children? Isn't that... important to you- a value?
(Again, BEN attempts to interject)
Wouldn't your father be so... so happy and honored- Honor! Children in your father's honor!

As MOM speaks, she begins to dry spoons, forks, and knives. Without paying much attention, she picks up a knife and, with much force, wraps her hand around the blade. Her bare hand is covered by the towel, yet there is still blood and a mark. With a loud inhale, she drops the knife into the sink. BEN rushes to care for her. These next lines are spoken as BEN guides MOM over to the chair so he can properly look at the damage from underneath the kitchen table light.

MOM
I'm fine... it's fine... just a little cut. That's all. 

BEN
You have to pay attention. You can't flip into this mania, go around cutting yourself up, bleeding all over your freshly mopped floors.
(BEAT.)
(making a joke) You wouldn't like it if I did that, would ya?

They share a soft moment together as BEN places pressure on his MOM's hand. After a beat MOM begins to speak.

MOM
(slyly) You know what I would like... 

BEN
(standing up from his squatted position)
STOP!

MOM
You're always complaining that there aren't any woman for you here,
so why don't you, I don't know, expand your horizon.

BEN
Expand my horizon?

MOM
Absolutely!
(soft pause)

For example, a few cities over....

BEN
(desperate to close this conversation)
It's not going to happen. It won't. It's not. I try to tell you, and you just won't listen. 

MOM
I'm listening. I'm always listening. 

BEN
(sighing, trying to offer concrete reasoning) I can't... break this-

MOM
You're breaking my heart, you know that?

With a heavy sigh, BEN crosses his MOM to sit in the open chair. He takes her hand and they sit quietly for a moment.

BEN
I'm sorry... that I'm disappointing you.

MOM

No, your father disappointed me.
(pause)
Up and dying like that.

They share this moment together. It's a little bit funny, enough to smile by. After a BEAT, MOM continues-

MOM
(softly) 

Don't you... don't you want to have a family?
Don't you want to father the children of a beautiful wife?
Extend the family tree, Ben.

BEN doesn't speak, until it hits him-

BEN
Why are you so invested?
Huh?
Because if we want to be honest here...
You're not even...
(he pauses, unsure of how to say what he's trying to say)
You're not even my real mother.

This comment both surprises yet doesn't affect MOM. After a BEAT she slowly rises and walks back towards the sink. She turns on the water and begins to scrub a new plate. BEN sits idle at the table, thinking of what he had just said.

MOM
(after a build of great tension)
You know....
It's not just you.

BEN
What?

MOM
Through me...

You have a brother.

LIGHTS FADE to the sound of river water splashing. The kitchen set is removed and a YOUNG MOM is now standing center, holding a canoe paddle. 

a conversation
Google images, round table

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

I decided to write a contemporary style play based on Mahabharata Episode 6 - Satyavati's Secret, due to the medium of the media. I was inspired by the moment when Satyavati is trying to convince her to son to break his promise of abstinence. I love reflecting on this story, and how much Satyavati really does love Bheeshm. I wanted to try and capture that tender relationship. I obviously changed the names to fit the style. Bheeshm as Ben, and Satyavati as Mom. The play would continue with a flashback to Satyavati as a young girl, the day she meets Parashara.

Reading Notes, Mahabharata Episode 6

Since I'm currently taking a course in playwriting, I had the idea to turn Satyavati's Secret into a script. These stories are such dramas, why not dramatize one? I'll specifically address Bheeshm and  Setyawati's relationship and I want to address the secrets, like how he actually has a brother, Vyas.

In my mind this is actually very contemporary, and quite a funny scene. I think the concept of a mother having to literally beg her son to sacrifice his abstience is hilarious, at least in our society. And, of course, "you have a half brother, he was before you, and actually.... he's a better poet than you'll ever be. And I got stuck with you?". Classic mom line!

Setting: Kitchen
Possible name changes? Ben/Bheeshm
                                        Sara/ Setyawati

I think that this will be a really interesting exercise in storytelling. As a playwright (I don't feel justified in referring to myself as a playwright....)

As a person who writes plays I include a lot of explicit and exact stage directions, referring to scenery, character psyche, environment, movement, etc. so for this assignment I'm going to write much more of that, so I'm still writing within the word count!

I'm learning to practice a growth mindset, which is what
inspired this concept!
Here's to a new challenge!
Google Images, carriekeeple.com

VIDEO REFERENCE: Begin at 1:00
Youtube- Mahabharata Episode 6
Epified

Growth Mindset: Gratitude

GRATITUDE
The Amazing Effects of Gratitude

So, I just closed my first play of my senior year. Let me tell you... it was a real challenge, this play. It started off a little weird, because I was put in the position of having to make a choice. Either accept a role offered to me (Which was Oskar's Mum in Let The Right One In) or be up for two really great shows in the fall, where I could definitely fit into either one. (Children's Hour and Vinegar Tom)
I'm not a strong decision maker.... so this was like, my own personal hell for a week. Do I take the main stage? Or do I take the opportunity for a larger role which would probably stretch my acting ability and allow me to break from the mold of always playing the role of a mother? 

Long story short, I took Let The Right One In. And I immediately felt like I made the wrong choice.
Something inside of my body didn't feel right about it, but I dislocated from that because I "knew" I made the smart, safe choice.

Fast forward to the actual rehearsal process... I was doing a pretty good job, but I was bored because all of my scenes were so short and the script was pretty freakin' bad, so there wasn't much to work with. I was jealous of everyone else.... everyone got to be in movement pieces, or be killed by a vampire, or play in the SNOW on stage! And me? I drink colored water from a wine glass and smoked an e-cig. I didn't even get to die... Oskar's Mum didn't even get CLOSURE in the play! What was I thinking?! And then my director stopped working with me, because he trusted my process and "was the last thing he was worried about". I grew frustrated and by the final night of dress rehearsal I was done with the whole experience. I felt like my senior year was off to a shit start and I was having none of it. Unfortunately, I was stuck in that rut for the majority of our run.

Then one night, after what was a really good show, I made a comment to one of my good friends and cast mate. "It's almost over."
Walking to my car that night, I thought about how this play was her university debut performance. I thought about how freaking cool the show was, even if I wasn't part of the "cool" factor. (It was SO technically driven... it was taken from the novel/movie of Let The Right One In, which is why it was very cenimatic/poorly scripted.) I decided that I needed to shift my mindset. There were two more shows left, and I was going to make it count.

The next night we had our best audience, and that night an alumni found me so he could share about how I (as Oskar's Mum) reminded him of his relationship with his mom. There's a high stakes scene between Oskar and his mum, in which she slaps him across the face and has a short monologue, "You think I shouldn't drink? Just look at you! A savage, a hooligan, I produce this and I shouldn't drink?"

He took me by the shoulders and explained that his mom had a drug problem while he grew up, and that we (Oskar's Mum and I) captured that moment perfectly. He cried, even.

That singular moment, that connection, made the whole run worth it to me. To know that my character made a difference to at least one person was really all I needed. I allowed myself to really change the way I played Mum for the rest of the run. Since I was feeling less bitter and victimized, so did she. And the audience stopped laughing when the officer told her to "fuck off". Instead they found sympathy for her.

There's even more stories of what changed, but I won't go into further detail. How does this relate to the Growth Mindset prompt? I just started finding gratitude. I checked my stupid ego at the door and decided to be grateful to be in such a cool production. I decided to be grateful for all of the underclassmen and the opportunity they were getting. I decided to be grateful towards my director who really left it up to me. I was grateful for feeling like shit so I could learn how to get over it. Most of all, I was grateful towards Mum for finally letting me figure her out. I always felt unsatisfied after a show, because Mum doesn't get a resolve (okay, a lot of that has to do with poor playwriting) but I'm usually always able to figure it out. While I was never given that sense of resolve, I gratefully learned how to live with something that made me uncomfortable.

It was a challenge, because I didn't feel like I reached my own expectation with this specific role. I could be sitting on my couch right now, feeling very bitter but relieved to be done with said play. But instead, I took a breath of gratitude and I'm now happy for the experience. I learned a lot of lessons that I wouldn't have if everything went the way I planned. It's been tough, but I'm so grateful.

A personal picture from Let The Right One In
(Costumes by Lloyd Cracknell)
A crew member caught a picture of Mum while I was waiting for my first scene entrance.
(E-cig and water!)